Failing again.

Well, I missed another lecture today. And it was an assessed one. I'm starting to truly give up on everything. Fail at my life.I don't know how long I can keep this up. All I want is to lie curled up in a ball under my duvet away from everything. The guilt is really kicking in now as well..knowing how much pain i'm about to cause. I can feel it on me. Its like a weight all over my body dragging me down. But I don't feel right here. I feel like I was born out of place, with no true destiny. My death will change lives forever..but what if in the long run, i'm better preparing my loved ones for something in their future? I know my time here is almost over, I can feel it approaching.